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Am I compatible with my partner?
I have lost count how many times I am asked this at conferences and workshops that I run. Along with such questions as…
- ““Do opposites attract?”
- “Will I be OK with someone of the same primary colour type?”
- “Which colour type suits (insert any colour type here) best?”
- “Which colour type is the worst choice for a (insert any colour type here)?”
There is an answer… and it strangely has little to do with primary colours… here it is:
All combinations of colour preference have their advantages and their challenges… so as long as there is understanding and acceptance of the similarities AND THE DIFFERENCES, then all will be OK whatever the combination. This is otherwise known as “Respect”.
There follows some specific advice for different primary colours!
If YOU are primary RED and your partner is primary…
Red… Schedule opportunities for you two to CHILL OUT together!
Yellow… Take opportunities to socialise with each other and with other friends
Blue… Whilst out, appreciate that for your partner, observing is as enjoyable as being involved
Green… Remember to recognise their gifts and abilities – and take time to provide regular positive affirmation and ‘strokes’
If YOU are primary YELLOW and your partner is primary…
Yellow… Share the spotlight and remember to compliment them often
Green… Appreciate that, if they are quiet, it is not because they are rejecting you! They need this time to recharge their batteries
Red… Remember that they may not be able (or willing!) to compliment you all the time!
Blue… Provide well-considered and specific positive feedback in a low-key way. Blue energy needs quiet reassurance that you value their contributions.
If YOU are primary GREEN and your partner is primary…
Green… Make joint plans and encourage each other to hold true to your respective responsibilities outside the relationship
Blue… Understand that their need to withdraw is not a personal rejection – and do not move their things without asking permission
Yellow… Spring a surprise. Spontaneous acts are exciting for Yellow energy
Red… Try to be direct with your feedback – and take the initiative to instigate new/different ways of doing things
If YOU are primary BLUE and your partner is primary…
Blue… Look for activities to do and events to attend TOGETHER
Red… Introduce activities that are not run-of-the-mill and are outside of your normal routine
Green… Let them know what you feel as well as what you think
Yellow… Show how you feel. Small displays of affection like hand-holding or a hug will go a long way
Where things can go wrong is when, whatever attracted you to them in the first place, becomes the actual problem! Think: Originally attracted by the strong, silent type, now repelled by what you now see as his lack of engagement. OR: Originally attracted by her attention and affection – now repelled by what you now perceive as neediness.
See how that can work?
Yoo wisdom: Above all – remember that self-awareness, respect, kindness and understanding are building blocks of any relationship (whatever the colour type). Consider the positive AND negative impact of your primary colour on your PARTNER’S primary colour.
Be your best Yoo
Andy and the team at Yoo